My Saturday

It's Saturday and there's no better way to start off the day than with a nice six mile run. Although it was a little chilly, it was a beautiful morning! The sun was shining and the skies were blue. It felt as though God made this day just for me... for my run. My endorphins were flowing and it felt great!

After my 6 mile run

After my run I stretched and iced my knees. I've been experiencing some mild to moderate knee pain beginning a few miles into my runs. I'm thinking it may be my iliotibial band. (If anyone has some tips for how to manage knee pain while training please let me know) I'm thinking about visiting a running specialty store this weekend to get some good advice and possibly new shoes, a knee band, and a foam roller!

Next on the agenda - trying out my new baby cakes donuts maker. It was my first time making donuts and, I've gotta say, they didn't turn out half bad. I know what you're thinking... why run six miles and then ruin it by eating donuts? But you've gotta splurge every once and awhile. I've found that if I'm too restrictive with my diet, that I end up having a "cheat" day that goes way overboard. It's a lot easier to stick with exercising and eating right if you allow yourself some sweets and other "junk" food once and awhile. Moderation is the key.

Yummy!

Then, after demonstrating my mad donut-making skills, I took a nice hot shower and laid my little man down for his afternoon nap. Micah's new favorite thing to do is to climb out of his crib and pack and play. I'm glad my baby boy is so strong and mighty, but the pack and play is the only place we can could put him for a minute to keep him safe and out of the way while we got some stuff done. So I spent the next half hour repeatedly putting my toddler back into his crib and attempting to settle him down for a nap.

Here's a picture of daddy holding the little crazy man after we finally gave up on the nap .

Now it's time to kick back and enjoy the afternoon. The big boys are outside getting some exercise old school style by riding their bikes and playing Nerf wars - a totally made up game they play with the neighborhood kids that includes a very serious set of rules. In a little while, I will take Riley to Walmart to spend his Christmas money. (He's been begging me to take him for like two weeks and we just haven't found a good time when neither he or I are busy with other obligations and we both felt up to going.) I took Khegan shopping to spend his Christmas the week after Christmas, but Riley was up visiting my grandparents for x-mas break so he didn't get to go. 

Then, a little later I will make dinner for the family and possibly the boys' friends if they are still around. Dinner is going to be either spaghetti or tacos. I haven't decided yet. Any votes? 

Finally, I'll wrap up my Saturday with a family movie night and some snuggle time with my man. 

I LOVE the weekends!

And this one has THREE whole days - yay!  :-)

Sick Kids, Helpful Husband

There has not been one day since Thanksgiving that someone in my house hasn't been sick. It started with a stomach virus Khegan brought home from his mom's house the weekend before Thanksgiving. It was a short-lived 24 hour virus that he got from his sister. He was sick on Sunday night and seemingly better by Monday afternoon. 


Around this same time dear hubs and I were getting a 'cold' (from hell) but we didn't know that yet. 

So Thanksgiving rolls around. We hosted. There were had about 30 relatives at our house on the big day. Things went fairly well. Everyone brought a yummy dish. I managed to cook a decent turkey. The half dozen or so kiddos running around the house thankfully did not break anything, spill anything, or hurt anyone. After a fun filled day everyone went home, mama collapsed on the couch, and my helpful hubby finished the clean-up efforts. We were in bed by 10 o'clock.

At 11:30 Riley was knocking on the bedroom door, "Mommy... Mommy... MOMMY!"  Then I hear running ... bathroom door opens... toilet seat slams up... and the puking commences.

One by one over the next week and a half the stomach virus makes it's rounds. Not only with my little family, but also the extended family - all of our Thanksgiving day guests.

Luckily, little Micah man managed to avoid the stomach flu, although he did run a temp off and on during this time.

Meanwhile I have a cold that will not stop. I stock up on Dayquil, Nightquil, and cough drops. I suffer through work because I recently called off to stay home with sick kids. When you're a mom your sick time no longer belongs to you. You're sick - you work. Your kids are sick - you call off. 

Fast forward to Mid-December. 

Christmas Shopping. 

Picture this... Micah has been patiently drug along all day all day while DH and I do some shopping  - big kids are in school and we are taking full advantage of the opportunity. We hit Old Navy, Bath & Body Works, Khol's, we stop to pick up a few gift cards at various places, and even stop for lunch. Micah seems to be feeling a little under the weather, but he is being a trooper. One more stop on the way home. 

Walmart. 

We spend about an hour shopping and our cart is full to the gills. As we proceed to the checkout line, DH notices Micah's ears are draining (kiddo has had so many ear infection that he to get tubes last March and the ENT said if we see drainage that equals ear infection). So there we are in line to check out. John is holding Micah. I am pushing the cart. John says Micah feels really warm. I turn to feel his head and inspect his ears that's when it happens... how that much PUKE can come out of such a little person is beyond me! ALL over John, all over Micah, all over the floor. Some one me, but I managed to avoid the worst of it. 

As the responsible parents we are, we get Micah's ear drop script filled ASAP and start treating his ear infection. We give him drops for 10 days. He starts to feel better as we approach Christmas. 

I'm still hacking. John still has a sinus infection. Micah's ear infection appears to be improving. Then, Christmas Eve, Riley uncharacteristically asks to go to bed at 9 o'clock - he's not feeling well. That develops into another stomach bug for him. 

Micah seems to start getting worse, not better. During the week after Christmas, he gets congested again and then starts running a temp again around New Years Eve. Thinking it has to be a cold (remember, we've already treated the ear infection) his daily treatment consists of baby Motrin, Vicks Vapor Rub at naptime and bedtime, and extra cuddles. No improvement.

Finally, I call the pediatrician yesterday and they asked us to bring him in to make sure the ear infection did actually clear up. 

Now, since I've used so much sick time over the last month staying home to take care of sick kids, my helpful hubby, being the great father he is, makes arrangements to take this morning off and take Micah to the doctor's office. He had to call the office today because you can't make a 'sick visit' in advance. They can't get him in til 11 ... they wait in the waiting room til 11:30 ... and then another hour in the exam room before the doctor sees them. And guess what?

He STILL has an ear infection! 

So by the time DH goes to Walgreens to pick up the antibiotics and a new dose of ear drops, it's after 1 pm and so much for the work day, right? He calls to give me a quick update as he heads to the pharmacy and then home to relieve our nanny, who has been patiently waiting for several hours (thanks, Nyla!).

The point of this long, rambling, story?

It is STRESSFUL when you're sick and your kids are sick and your husband is sick and you're trying to juggle your family AND your work responsibilities!

Thank goodness I am no longer a single mother! And thank the Lord that my hubby is not afraid to roll up his sleeves to take care of sick kids, change a diaper, clean the house, fold laundry, or cook us a meal. I am truly blessed to have such a great husband who is always willing to step up to the plate and take care of anything (and everything) that needs done. 

Letters to God

One of the most important tasks we are entrusted with as parents is teaching our children about God. A strong faith in God will help your children to get through many difficult situations. Religion helps guide parents to teach there children proper moral values.

It can be difficult, at times, to teach children about God in terms they understand. That is why I am always looking for fun and creative ways to teach my children about God.

Last weekend, my mother came to visit and brought this book as a gift to my boys. I LOVE this book. It is about a little boy named Tyler who's father had taught him to talk to God when he needs help.

On this particular day Tyler needed help finding a compass to take on a fishing trip with his grandpa. He decides to write a letter to God asking for help. As he walks to the mailbox, he passes other people who are in need of help. Each time he stops and adds to his letter, asking that God help the other people.

It is a very sweet book that teaches children how to talk to God and how to pray for themselves and others. It is very basic and easy to read. The reading level is probably from about 1st to 3rd grade (my boys are in 2nd and 3rd and both had no problem reading the book aloud).

At the end of the book there is an envelope with a blank letter. It says "Dear God" at the top and "Love," at the bottom. This is for your child to write their own letter to God. After reading this book, both of my boys were very excited to write their own letters to God. They spent the biggest part of an hour on their letters! To preserve the book, I made copies of the blank letter for them to actually write on. That way they can write more and more letters to God using the template from the book.

This blog was not a paid review and is not in conjunction with a giveaway of any kind - I just LOVED this book! If you are interested in buying your own Letters to God book here is the link to buy from Amazon.

What's Your Homework Policy?

My boys start back to school this week! Our district has a policy of a "staggered start" which means each of the boys will only go to school one day this week, but next week we'll be back in the full swing of things. And that means homework.

My boys are so different when it comes to academics and their learning styles. Riley usually catches on pretty quickly when it comes to math, but Khegan takes a little longer. Khegan is very good at writing creative stories. Riley struggles a little bit with keeping his handwriting neat. Khegan is patient and will listen when you are trying to help him. Riley (not unlike his mother) gets frustrated very easily when he doesn't pick stuff up right away.

All of these differences play out at homework time. Khegan is very slow in completing his homework, while Riley tends to zip right through it. Last year it was quite challenging to be done with homework before 9 o'clock. By the time I get off work, fought down town traffic and picked up the kids from the sitter, we don't get home until almost 6 o'clock. John gets home later than that. Once home, I have to get myself organized and then start dinner.

This is how our routine would go. Riley would zip through his math worksheet and go off to play. I would continue to work with Khegan on his math and spelling while also cooking dinner. Then we would break from homework to eat. Then John would take over finishing up the math and spelling with Khegan while I'd clean up dinner. Then we would each grab a kid and sit down to listen to them read for 20 minutes. Somewhere in there we managed to squeeze in a nightly shower for each kiddo.

It was tough - especially on nights when they had ball practice.

This year the routine is going to have to be different. It's too exhausting (for the boys & for us) to be doing homework for so long and until so late. The plan is to have them do all there homework, except for reading, at the babysitters house. School gets out at 2:30 so they have a good three hours before I get there to pick them up. Then when we get home, I will review the home work with them and redo the problems they missed. Then all that is left is their reading. Instead of having them read to me for 20 minutes, I will have them read to me for 10 and then read to themselves for the other 10 and give me a short oral "book report".

Hopefully this new homework routine will give us a little more free time in the evenings!

What's your homework policy? Do you have your children do their homework as soon as they get home? Or, do you let them play a little bit first? Are they pretty independent in completing it? Or, do you have to help every step of the way? 

Back to School Anxiety

My boys start back to school this week. Last week they were both very excited. Khegan is still very excited. Riley? Not so much. This week Riley has started to get more and more nervous about going back to school. Sunday night he had a meltdown at bedtime because he had himself so worked up about going back to school.



"Mommy, I'm never going to see you anymore!" That's not true. His day won't be any longer than what it has been all summer. He will go to babysitter after school and I will pick him up at 5:40 - just like I do every single night. So I explained that to him.

"But mommy, I have bad handwriting! Mrs. Krueser is going to make me do my work over and over again. Or, if I write slow(ly) I will always be the last one done!" He is sobbing as he says this. I told him that he needs to slow down so his hand writing is more neat. Yes, that is what Mrs. Donohue said over and over in 1st grade. I reminded him that he got nothing but good grades last year and the Mrs. Krueser (Khegan had her last year) is a very nice teacher. Also, I pointed out that even if he is never has the neatest handwriting, he will never have the worst either.

"Mommy, what if none of my friends are in my class?" I explained to him that he would have some kids in his class that he knows from last year, but would meet some new friends too.

"But mommy, 2nd grade has recess with 1st grade so I will never see my brother or my friend Zane (neighbor boy) during recess!" I told him he would have plenty of time to play with Khegan and Zane after school.


I thought the anxiety would die down after the Meet n Greet on Monday night, but it only seemed to make things worse. Riley has always been a "slow to warm up" kinda kid. However, once he warmed up all bets were off! He is then super outgoing, if not bossy, and is very charismatic - all the other kids want to be his friend. So it amazes me how he has this anxiety every year before school starts. 

Every time he gets anxious I do what I've been trained to do, as a social worker, to help dispell the anxiety. I address his fears and explain why they are irrational. We talk about ways for him to make new friends. (Which he usually does very easily once he warms up.) He has been to the school. He has met his teacher. He has seen his classroom. He knows how his day will go. I've encouraged him by pointing out that he is smart and cute and funny and kids like him. Still, it does not seem to be doing the trick.  

Have your kids ever had back to school anxiety? If so how have you helped them to overcome it?

Resource:
Here is a great article I found on Ease Back to School Anxiety and how to help calm your child's fears.

Today I Had to Tell My Son There is No Tooth Fairy

This morning I traumatized my eight year old son. I need to throw some more money in his therapy fund. He will be telling this story for years to come.

Last Tuesday evening Riley lost another tooth. Wednesday morning he says, "The tooth fairy didn't come!"

Shit.

"She didn't come? Did you put your tooth under your pillow?"

"No. I forgot. I left it on the kitchen counter."

Sigh of relief. "Well that's why silly! Put it under your pillow tonight and she'll come. I promise."

This morning I get up, take my shower, and go to wake up Riley. I nudge him awake and walk downstairs to turn on the coffee pot. (Coffee is VERY important in my house!) When I get back upstairs he is sitting on the bed crying.

"What's wrong honey?!" I ask.

"The Tooth Fairy HATES me!!!!!"

Shit. Shit. SHIT! 

"She took my tooth, and didn't leave me any money! She hates my teeth!"

I took a deep breath and sat down next to him on the bed. Do I tell him? Or, do I not? As I looked at my crying child I knew I had no choice. Better he hate me than think some imaginary fairy hates him.

"Riley, honey, it was mommy who forgot to leave you money."

He sniffles and stares up at me. And grunts.

"Mommies and daddies leave tooth fairy money to help little kids have courage when they lose their teeth."

"No...."

"Yes. Mommy is sorry."

"Khegan was.... was... right! You LIED!"

Yes, my stepson Khegan (who's 5 weeks younger than Riley) has been saying for weeks that his mommy was the Tooth Fairy. He saw her sneak into his room and get out her wallet.

At our house we denied this rumor and cursed his mother for being such an idiot. And Riley believed us. Khegan we almost had convinced. I can only imagine the secretive talks those two boys are having right now about how I lied.

No tooth fairy.

"Riley, it's not really a lie. It's an... incentive. An incentive to help you be brave enough to pull out your teeth."

He grunts and sniffles and starts to get dressed.

I thought it was over. I had succeeded. That wasn't too bad...

A few minutes later, down in the kitchen he is still grunting. No words.

"Riley, what's wrong? Are you mad at mom?"

He bursts into tears.

SSSHHHIIIIITTTT!!!!!

"Riley, it's ok. It is really ok. Now, don't you smile at mommy. Don't you laugh...."

He stifles a grin before he starts grunting and sniffling and crying again.

"Riley, don't laugh! Don't even think about laughing at mommy! And whatever you do, don't kiss me..."

Crying.

"Don't laugh because... because... Because if you do I'll have to give you $10!"

He laughed.

And kissed me.

And it only cost $10.

The Monday Blues

It's Monday.

Again.

This weekend has gone by too quickly. As a working mom, I dread Mondays. Mondays mean the start of another long week. Five more days until the next glimpse of freedom. Five more days I will not be with my kids. Weekends go by so quickly, but sometimes the weeks just drag.

Usually, I try to stay very upbeat and positive about everything in my life, but today I'm just not feeling it.

I have the Monday blues. 

So I'm going to whine a little bit.

Monday means that I have to go back to the fertility doctor. I have to get my blood drawn, which I hate. And it's becoming a regular occurrence. I am not looking forward to it. In fact, I'm dreading it. It's bad enough I have to give myself a shot every night. Then to have to go to the doctors several times a week to get my blood drawn, get an ultrasound of my ovaries, and then get told that my levels are "off" just makes me depressed.

There I said it.

It makes me depressed.

Whine, whine, whine.

Monday also means another long week of work for my husband. His job requires a lot of hours and he doesn't get home until seven or eight o'clock (his work day starts at 7 am). I miss him. Being in charge of taking the kids to the babysitters and picking them up from the babysitters and getting dinner and making sure they get their showers kinda makes a woman feel like a single mother even though she's not. But, what's worse is that my hubby is so exhausted when he gets home and he still helps clean up dinner, set up the coffee pots for the next day, and packs his lunch. It makes me feel like a failure as a wife. I should be doing all of that stuff for him.

Instead, I blog. For me.

Then I put myself on a guilt trip.

It's hard to take care of a family and work full time, I rationalize. But really, I should just be a better wife and do more to ease his stress. That's what it's all about, right? Taking care of each other.

Monday also means that the things I did not accomplish this weekend will not get done for at least a week. Yes, we did all the necessary chores to maintain for a week - laundry, grocery shopping, tidying up. But, the vacuuming, bathrooms, dusting, and mopping will all have to wait. I didn't get enough done around the house and I didn't relax as much as I would have liked to either.

Whine, whine, whine. Waa, waa, waa.

Time to suck it up and get on with life. 

Because it's Monday. 

Again.

My Baby Turns 8 On August 9th!!!

Today we had Riley's 8th birthday party! I can't believe my baby is turning 8 years old! In honor of him turning eight, I wanted to put up a blog post with an infant picture of him and then another picture with his eight year old self. However, it occurred to me that all of his infant and baby pictures are safely stored away in my grandparents barn - an hour away.

When I moved to Columbus to live with my husband, we lived in a small apartment for about six months before we bought our house. In an effort to save space, I stored a lot of things in my grandparents barn. When we moved into our house, the baby albums never got moved. So I had to choose these pictures from the limited pictures that did make it to our house.  The one on the left was taken when Riley was only a few days old. The one on the right was taken the day Riley was baptized - he was about seven months old. The quality of the pictures isn't great, but you can see what an adorable baby he was!

And now he is a big 8 year old boy! He will be in second grade next year. He can pour his own milk. He can make his own bed. He can read. There are so many things he can do for himself now. I am so proud of the sweet young man he is becoming. Still, I am a touch sad that he is getting so big and the years are passing so quickly. He's went from this sweet adorable little baby, to this big bright-eyed boy!

Busy Weekend Planned

This weekend is going to be a rush.

My mom is in town. We are babysitting my 2 nephews (both under 2) ALL day tomorrow. Taking the boys (my boys) to sign up for football tomorrow. Riley is going to state fair with his paternal grandma tomorrow. (I know paternal g'ma sounds weird, but it's the social worker in me.) Also I have to find a medical laboratory open tomorrow to get my blood taken because aunt flow decided to come to town finally (at the worst possible time) and I need to have blood drawn before I can start my fertility shots on Sunday.

And I have cramps. Haven't had cramps in months but apparently this weekend, when I am uber busy, I get cramps. Fabulous. And probably too much information, but it is late when I am writing this and I am tired. So, oh well.

On Sunday... Church. Cake and ice cream for my son's 8th Bday (OMG 8!). Still need to buy him a gift. (Adding that to my Saturday list.) Lots of people at my house. Probably need to clean. Probably won't have time. After the party, my neice is spending the night. Oh, and I start my shots. I'm nervous.

Monday, I am taking the boys and niece to the pool. (For my son's 8th birthday. He's half way to 16, when he can drive, so help me Lord.) After the pool, then I have to drive Riley to my grandparents house, one hour away. Yes, my grandparents - his great grandparents, because they are keeping him for the week. Why? Because my babysitter is on vacation. I suppose she is allowed to have one.

I'm exhausted just writing about it. And there is no picture on this post. Because I am lazy tonight.

Back To Reality & Reflections of a Peaceful Day

Back to Reality 

It's Monday. My week of vacation has come to an end. I am back to reality and, of course, work. We arrived home Saturday afternoon, which worked out remarkably well. I was able to get our bags unpacked and make a Walmart trip Saturday afternoon. Then, while I put away groceries and made dinner, hubs mowed the yard. And, by the way, the weed bed yard REALLY needed to be mowed. I think next year we are going to have to break down a pay chem lawn to make our grass purdy.

We had a fabulous time on vacation. Tune into my wordless Wednesday post to see just how fabulous of a time we had! It's always a little sad going back to work after a nice relaxing week with the family. However, I think that the day-to-day "stuff" makes us appreciate each other and the time we have to share together all the more. A week away allows us to come back to center - meaning that it allows us to refocus on what is important in life. Sometimes it is all too easy to get caught up with the day-to-day "stuff" and lose sight of what matters most - God, family, friends, love.

Reflections of a Peaceful Day

I am sitting on the beach as I write this post. It is a beautiful day! We've had nothing but gorgeous, sunny weather all week long! The boys are loving the water. They have been "boogie boarding" and wave jumping all week long!

The sun is shining down on me and I feel at peace with the world. My husband, the love of my life, is sitting next to me, holding my hand. There are so many blessings in my life and I feel grateful for them every day. Yet, at this moment, I feel especially grateful. Almost like God is shining down all of his blessings directly onto me and my family. 

This sense of peace and harmony is something I wish for all mothers. A beautiful day. A loving family. A happy heart. The power to create that peace is within us all. It is called love.

Random Ramblings of a Tired Mommy

Today is day two of my writer's block. I've been sitting at my computer for an hour. I've checked my email. I've checked Twitter. I've read some blog posts. I've checked Facebook. Checked Twitter again. Checked email again. Still no inspiration to write. And I'm tired. And it's almost 10:30 p.m. (But you'll be reading this in the morning because I am going to use my nifty auto-post feature again.)

I'm ready to crawl into bed.

It's been a long day.

A normal Monday.

I woke up. I took my shower. I got dressed. I woke Khegan up. (We only have Khegan this week. Riley is visiting the grandparents.) I walked downstairs and poured my coffee. I packed my lunch. I gave Maxie a treat and put her in her cage. 

This is Maxie.

Funny story about Maxie... We've had her a little over a year. She still poops in the house. And when she is mad at us, then she pees in the house too. We can't seem to get her trained to do her business outside all the time. She knows better. I think she does it to mess with me. And when she is pissed off. John says it's obvious she is a female dog.

If I didn't know better I would say she was just a dumb dog.

She is not dumb.

She is crafty.

The one thing Maxie understands is how to get a treat. Every morning she gets a treat when we put her in her cage. We started this routine because she didn't like going in her cage. Now, every morning she is ready and waiting for that treat.

It's a free treat.

The only treat she gets that is not a reward for doing her business outside.

This is how it goes. Every. Single. Morning. I walk downstairs. She jumps up on me and barks. I lean down and pet her. She runs to the doorway of the kitchen. Then, while I'm pouring my coffee, packing my lunch, and taking care of whatever needs taking care of in the kitchen; she watches me. She stands in the doorway and watches. If I make a move toward the drawer where her treats are kept, she runs full speed into her cage and waits. For her treat.

Yep.

That she's that smart.

And she still shits in the house.

Hmph. That made for a good little story. Writers block is resolved. But if you're still curious how the rest of my day went - it was pretty boring.

Work.

Then Khegan and I went bargain hunting for some beach toys. (Vacation next week!) We found some at Big Lots. Buckets and shovels. Frisbee. Paddle ball. Those curved, sling-shoty things you toss a ball and play catch with - I don't know what the official name is. Anyways. Beach toys. We bought beach toys.

I took Khegan to dinner. Just the two of us. He picked Burger King. Bleck.

At home I put away dishes. Reloaded the dishwasher. Went through the mail. Wrote out some bills. Had the "hi honey, how was your day?" conversation with the hubs. Sent the kiddo upstairs to shower and get ready for bed. Tucked him in.

And now here I sit blogging about it all...

Kids, Summer, and Reading

We are about half way through the summer. In approximately six weeks our children will be returning to school. I'll be honest - we've slacked off on the reading since school has been out. At first I wanted to give the boys a break from it. Reading somehow becomes less fun when you are forced to read for homework for twenty minutes every night. And, as a parent, you can grow to dread those twenty minutes. Yet, when the pressure is off, it is very rewarding to snuggle down with your school-age child and let them read you a bedtime story!

Tonight the boys and I all piled into Riley's twin bed, pulled the covers up around us, and read. I read the boys one of my all-time favorite children's stories, Where the Wild Things Are. My heart gets heavy because my boys are getting to the age where they say, "That story is for babies!" But, they hung on to every word!

Then I listened as Khegan and Riley read me chapters of out Diary of a Wimpy Kid. (If you thinking to yourself that you have never heard of Diary of a Wimpy Kid, then your children are either very young or young adults, because this book is a hit amongst school-age children.) The boys did a great job reading, given that it's only about the fifth time I've read with them this summer....

Yes, I could sit here and make excuses. They would be good excuses too. We have been uber busy this summer! I wanted to give the kids a little break from reading. The boys have been on the go from dawn til dusk and when I put them to bed they drop like flied. BUT, the fact of the matter is, mom's been slacking. I have been relishing the nights without homework, agenda books, and reading logs. It's time to start gearing back up and preparing the boys for the beginning of another academic year!

A Week of Epic Mom Fails - and it's only Wednesday!

This has been a week of epic "mom fails" and it's only Wednesday!

Every New Breed Mama has her moments when she forgets things in the hustle and bustle of daily life. Moms have to adhere to a lot of schedules. Sports schedules, Sunday school schedules, work schedules, babysitter's schedules, doctors appointments, etc. etc . Sometimes moms get busy, trying to do everything for everyone, and they sometimes forget stuff. Usually, it's small stuff.

You've probably heard the saying, "Don't sweat the small stuff." (Actually, I think it may be a book too.) So what happens when the small stuff starts to add up? If you're like me, you start doubting yourself as a mother. You may wonder about your sanity. Then you laugh. You have to laugh - to keep your sanity.

So far this week...

Monday: The boys had a baseball game schedules at 7:15 and John and I had our appointment with the fertility doctor at 6:30 on the other side of town. This was really mom fail #1 because I failed to consult the baseball schedule (aka the bible) before making the doctor appointment. Here I thought I was being a smart and considerate wife (and employee) by making the appointment after the workday. But, no. That was not the case. At all.

To make this work, I had to make a plan with my mother in law to pick the boys up from the babysitters. AND, I had to make sure that the boys uniforms, etc. were packed and ready to send with them to the sitters on Monday morning.

Well, I got lazy and procrastinated - procrastination always seems to be a precursor to mom fails. Monday morning I am rushing around trying to find all the pieces and parts that make up the boys uniforms.

Found Riley's stuff rather quickly and threw it in a Walmart bag. Then I hunted and hunted for Khegan's uniform and found nothing. Hubs looked. Nothing. He had to have left it at his mom's house. When you have a child who lives half the time with you and half the time with his mother, a lot gets lost in the back and forth.

Yep, well, I was wrong. Mom fail #2. It wasn't his mom who had failed. Nope. It was me. So in a frantic hurry I left work at 5, drove home, hunted for uniform, found uniform hiding in the corner of room under a pile of books and toys, drove to grandma's dropped off uniform, and still somehow made it back across town to the doctor appointment at 6:30.

Tuesday: On Tuesday evening I had to have a dreaded conversation with our babysitter about summer rates. We have always paid the sitter for a full-time schedule for Khegan even though he is only with us half the time. This is because his mom can be unreliable at times.

Well, she has been doing pretty good lately and I decided it was time to ease up on keeping the sitter as a back up for her. Plus it would save us a little money. My husband talked to her and she committed to getting Khegan from the sitters by mid-morning on Wednesdays and having him with her on Thursdays and Fridays. Seems easy enough.

So I talked to the sitter about only paying for part-time for Khegan for the rest of the summer. She was none too happy, but I stuck to my guns and she really had no choice, so she agreed.

Wednesday: Arrive to pick Riley up from sitter's at 5:30 - babysitter says, "Khegan was just picked up 5 mintues ago. Mom fail #3.

The boys had another baseball game tonight. Riley's grandmother, that he hasn't seen in 2 years, came to the game tonight. I had told her I would bring her some pictures of Riley. Originally, I had planned to get them together on Sunday, but again - procrastination. So tonight, after I picked up Ry, I hustled home to get him changed, fed, and gather up these pictures before we left.

We were about to walk out the door, pictures in my hand, and Riley says, "Mom, what did you do with my baseball glove?" Mom fail #4. Uh, I haven't seen your glove all week son. Seven years old and he doesn't remember where he leaves his glove.

We looked in the downstairs closets. We looked in the garage. We looked in the car. We looked in the upstairs closet. We looked under the bed. Finally found it in the dirty clothes basket! WTF?! I know. Now, we were in a hurry. Out the door and to the ballgame we go. Forgot the pictures. Mom fail #5.

During the baseball game it dawned on me that today is June 30th. Something had to be done by June 30th. What was it? Oh, yeah. Crap. Deadline for early registration for next year's PSR classes. (That's Catholic for Parish School of Religion). Mom fail #6. I guess we will just pay $40 more since I forgot to get the check in the mail. I'm on a roll.

After the game is over all the kids are standing around by the dugout. Coach gives out the game ball. The kids do their cheer. Khegan says, "Where's our snacks? Coach! Whose turn was it to bring snacks?!" Fuck. It was our turn. And my kid pointed it out to the whole team. And their parents. Mom fail #7. Epic.

Top #10 Reasons I HATE Cleaning Bathrooms (and some other fun tidbits)

We are winding down our week of no kids. This week has been a nice break, but I miss my little ones! Over the course of the week I've gotten to write in peace, enjoy a quiet house, sleep in an extra 30 minutes, arrive home 30 minutes early, meet the girls for happy hour, and spend some quality time with my sweet hubby.

Today, we slept in! Me til about 9 and then I laid around in bed because it was sooo nice not to have to jump up to settle an argument or feed two starving boys! Hubs slept til 11 o'clock! I was uber surprised because this is the man that gets up at 5 am all week long and 8 am on the weekends!

After a relaxing morning of sleeping in, drinking a whole pot of coffee all by myself (me & hubs have separate coffee pots, but that is another story entirely!), and talked on the phone for like 2 straight hours (so nice to talk w/o fifty-million child-related interruptions!); I finally decided to get my butt in gear and do something productive...

While hubs got a start on our laundry, which was considerably less than normal w/o the kids being here to use a different towel every day of the week, I started what I consider to be the worstest chore ever! Cleaning the bathrooms. I HATE cleaning the bathrooms.

Today, it was especially hard to get in the groove b/c hubs wanted to go out to a local sports bar to watch the U.S. team play in the World Cup. Found that weird to begin with b/c hubs hates soccer. He asked if I wanted to go with him and I declined so I could knock out the WORSTEST CHORE EVER!!

So now, for your reading pleasure...

The Top #10 Reasons I HATE Cleaning Bathrooms

10 - Bathrooms are funky! By far the funkiest rooms in the house - nasty!

9 - To clean the funkiest rooms in the house it requires every frickin cleaning supply known to man!

8 - Dragging all those cleaning supplies upstairs!

7- My hands get dried out from those harsh cleaning supplies!

6- Dust and crud!

5 - Soap scum!

4- Hairs sticking to the shower wall!

3- Nasty, moldly grout in the grooves of the tile!

2- Toilets! And we all know what happens in toilets - can we say ewww?!!!

1- In 2 weeks I'll have to clean them again!

Now that it's done (yay!), I am going to go take a shower in a sparkling clean bathroom and dirty it up again! And I think I might join hubs to watch some soccer after all! =)

A week without kids?! Oh My!

My kids are spending a WHOLE WEEK with with grandpa! My husband drove them to grandpa's house (3 hours away) earlier today!

Of course, I will miss them dearly this week... BUT do you KNOW what this MEANS?!

No kids to get up and dressed and fed in the morning!
No kids to take to the babysitters!
No kids to stop and pick-up after work!
No kids to get into the shower and off to bed!
No kids arguing in the car!
No kids to argue over whose turn it is to take out the dog!
No kids arguing over who gets to control of the computer or the Wii!
No kids arguing over who started the argument!
No kids with hurt feelings (over all the arguing) to tend to!
No kids to making a horrible racket! MY HOUSE WILL BE QUIET!!!
No kids leaving dirty we towels laying around the house!
No kids to make messes that I have to clean up!

Do you see a common theme here? NO KIDS!

Again, I will miss my kids dearly, don't get me wrong... BUT do you KNOW what I will be able to DO?!

I will be able to write in peace!
I will be able to sleep in for an extra 30 minutes each day!
I will be home at least 30 minutes earlier each day!
I will get to be ALONE with HUBS!
I will get to go out and meet my girlfriends for HAPPY HOUR!
I will be able to clean my house and it will STAY clean! (eh, well, if I choose to spend my kidless week cleaning...)
I will be able to blare my radio in the car!
I WILL BE ABLE TO DRIVE WITHOUT HEARING INCESSANT ARGUING!!!
I will be able to go to the grocery store alone!
I will be able to go on a date with hubs without having to arrange for a babysitter!
I will be able to walk around my house in a bath towel, OR NAKED! (but of course, I would never do that!)

Yet again, I will miss my children dearly...BUT do you KNOW how EXCITED I AM??!!

NO KIDS!

FOR AN ENTIRE WEEK!

Sagas of a Stepmother: Book Review of 'No One’s the Bitch'

If you are a stepmother, or if you are a mother whose child has a stepmother, then this book was written for you! Jennifer Newcomb Marine and Carol Marine are a mother-stepmother pair and the authors of this wonderful guide on how to build a better relationship between mothers and stepmothers.

No One’s the Bitch is a well-written guide that teaches woman about forming a better relationship with the ‘other woman’ in their life. The book starts out where most mother-stepmother pairs start out – lost and confused – and guides them through the grueling task of building an amicable relationship with one another. Jennifer and Carol’s book provides a no-nonsense, down-to-earth, approach for navigating through the murky waters of the mother-stepmother co-parenting relationship.

In my opinion, one of the best aspects of this book is its ability to identify and normalize many of the taboo feelings women experience as they struggle to form an extended family unit for the best interest of everyone involved. The feelings involved in forming a “blended family” (for lack of a better word) are complex and, at times, overwhelming. It is difficult for a stepmother to decipher how much, or how little, emotional investment to place in her stepchildren. It is also difficult for mothers to decipher how much, or how little, say-so is appropriate for a stepmother to have when it comes to her stepchildren.

Every family is different, and each woman will have to determine the answers to these questions in respect to themselves, their husbands (or ex-husbands), their stepchildren, and the ‘other woman’ in their lives. At one extreme, some stepmothers may play a very active role in parenting their stepchildren. At the other extreme, some stepmothers have no interest in parenting their stepchildren and consider that the mother and father’s role.

While No One’s the Bitch is a useful book for anyone who is a stepmother, or whose children have a stepmother; it will be most helpful to woman who will regularly be in situations where they must interact with ‘the other woman’. It offers a ten-step guide aimed at helping woman through the long and difficult transition that occurs when a divorced man with children remarries.

The first couple of chapters in the book focus on self-reflection. Women are challenged to take an inventory of what their current mother-stepmother relationship is like and how that affects their day to day life and stress levels. They are also challenged to look within themselves to identify their own “crap” that contributes to the nature of the current relationship.

Next the book guides women to look towards the future and imagine how their lives (and stress levels) would change if they were to have a cordial relationship with the ‘other woman’ – not to mention how this would positively benefit the children involved. Unfortunately, children are often the battleground in which such mother-stepmother battles rage.

The authors go on to explain how to take action and begin to reach out to the ‘other woman’ and eventually form a collaboration of parenting efforts. Being accountable for one’s own actions and committing to be better at communication are both positive steps in this direction. Finally, since we all know that change does not happen overnight, there are two chapters devoted to regrouping and strengthening the fragile mother-stepmother relationship while it is in its early stages. The book also reminds us to celebrate and look back to see how far we have come in building a positive, healthy relationship where there was once only hatred and chaos.

Another thing I loved about this book was how the authors wove in sections on how the remarried man with children may be feeling about the newfound relationship between his wife and his ex. The book touches on how the man can be instrumental in forming a collaborative parenting team, or how the man may need some coaching from the two women after they begin to work things out.

While it may not always be possible for stepmothers and mothers to get along, when it is possible the kids will benefit immensely. The ‘loyalty binds’ often experienced by children of divorced parents, will lessen. The transition between households will go more smoothly. And most importantly, children will feel a more cohesive sense of self when all the adults in their lives team up to form a solid parenting unit.

I have been lucky, and blessed, with a great husband and stepson, as well as my own wonderful little man. The last two and a half years, that we have spent forming a family, have had their ups and downs. Building a relationship with my stepson’s mother has been challenging as well as rewarding. There are still many, many wrinkles which may never get fully ironed out, but I have made a commitment to myself to be the best stepmother I can be – and, to me, that means forming an amicable relationship with my husband’s ex-wife. As I like to say, we are learning to be one big, modern family.

Stepmother relationships are one of the topics I am most passionate about. Please feel free to post any questions, comments, or suggestions for future articles on the topic. Below I have provided some links to additional resources about stepfamilies.

www.noonesthebitch.com
www.stepfamily.org
www.stepfamilies.info
www.stepmommag.com

“To blog, or not to blog?”

First, it must be said that I am a newbie blogger. It’s been a little over a month since I started blogging, and it’s no secret that I absolutely love it! I love writing. I love the rush I get when I hit the “publish” button. And I love reading everyone else’s blogs!

If only someone would pay me to spend my days at home writing articles, blogging, and reading the amazing blogs written by other, fabulous, New Breed Mamas... (And if, by some chance, you are someone willing to pay me to do just that, by all means, email me now! *Hint,hint. Wink, wink.*)

With that being said, my family can obviously not afford the luxury of me staying home to work on building up my writing career. That leaves little ole me to juggle a full-time, job, two kids, my husband, my house, our dog, and whatever else is needing done on any given day.

For this New Breed Mama, who is trying to do it all, finding time to work on my blog and other articles is difficult. (And that, my friends, may be the understatement of the year!) However, since I am a passionate woman, who is passionate about writing, I make the time – at least on most days.

Luckily, I am blessed with an amazing husband, who is super-supportive of my dream. He picks up where I leave off, and for that reason, he is my hero.

Still, there are days when it is very hard to find the time and energy to write. Today is one of those days.

Yesterday was my sons’ field day at school. Being the super-mom that I am, I had volunteered to run one of the activities. After agreeing to spend my Thursday with a bunch of crazy-excitable children who were ready for summer vacation, I had thought that I might as well schedule my Friday off work too. And heck, since I had Friday off too, and my 10 year high school reunion coming up the following week, and a fro that was desperately in need of some TLC, I was determined to pencil in a trip to Indianapolis to visit my rockin’ hairdresser of a mama!

So, my last day and a half has been a whirlwind of, 1- sugared-up elementary school students, 2 - driving three hours through a torrential down-pour with two argumentative, cranky, seven year olds who were coming down from a sugar-high, 3 – visiting with my mama and stepfather, and later my baby sister and brother in law, 4 – stepfather taking my boys for a fast ride in his little BMW convertible, 5 – brother in law taking each of the boys on their first-ever Harley ride, while I watched in absolute terror (yes, I made them wear helmets!), 6 – a spa day for me (yay!) including a manicure, pedicure, cut, color, and wax, while the boys spent the day swimming with grandpa, 7 – rushing home to make sure the boys made it to their 7 pm baseball game, 8 – spending a half hour waiting in the rain at the ball field, only to find out that their game was cancelled (which, then, the sun promptly re-appears!), 9 – dinner out with the family at a sports bar/restaurant (where, by the way, this woman won $65 dollars playing keno!), and finally 10 – home again, home again, jiggity, jig.

Once in the safety and comfort of my own home, as I felt the tiredness settling in, I had to ask myself, “To blog, or not to blog?”

What would you do?

A Day in the Life of a Suburban Mom

I love my life.


Every single day, I am thankful for all the blessings in my life. I am thankful for my wonderful, supportive husband who loves us all so much. I am thankful for my two handsome boys. I am thankful for our beautiful home. I am thankful for our dog, Maxie, although it can be a love-hate relationship at times. (Maxie still has many, many accidents!) I am thankful for my own wonderful mom. I am thankful for the bond I have with my sisters. I am thankful for my in-laws, who live nearby and are always ready to help out. There is so much to be thankful for.

Today, I slept in until ten-thirty! It was lovely. I woke up and walked downstairs to be greeted by two smiling boys who were eager to go to the swimming pool for the day. My husband had the coffee brewing just as he does for me every morning. (Making me coffee every morning is John’s own little way of reminding me how much he loves me.) After the coffee was ready, we enjoyed a leisurely morning of sipping our coffee and cuddling on the couch, while watching the boys playing with Maxie on the floor.

In the afternoon, we went down to our community pool. My best girlfriend and her baby joined us for a little while. It was fun to watch the boys splashing around in the water. They are big enough now that they can be trusted in the water so you don’t have to watch them every single second. That is nice because I was able to do some reading while relaxing poolside.

After we returned from the pool we had dinner and then all three of my exhausted boys took a nap. Then this mama made a trip to Walmart. I’ll let you in on a secret - Walmart is very important to suburban moms, or at least this one. It’s a one stop shop! I picked up a few groceries, my son’s allergy medication, and some play clothes for the boys all in the same, inexpensive store.

Ok, I ventured off there – this post is starting to sound like a Walmart add!

My point is that life can be crazy for suburban moms. This suburban mom juggles work, playing taxi to her kids, grocery shopping, volunteering for school functions, cooking, cleaning, and the list goes on and on. It’s hard, but I love it.

I love it because there are days like today - days spent relaxing with the family I live and breathe for. What a beautiful life.